The Season’s Top 10 Underwear Headlines

by Danny Schmittler

As you might have guessed, we here at The Underwear Expert do whatever it takes to bring you all the trends, stories and photos you could ever want, that includes saving you from some of the weirdest underwear headlines. Just consider this our monthly opening of the flood gates. In a single page, we’ve compiled some of the weirdest underwear headlines we’ve had to sift through (In December and November alone!), and laid out our 10 best for you to laugh, cry and just plain shake your head at.

You really just can’t make this stuff up, folks. Check out our top 10 underwear headlines below, and let us know what you think!

#10 in the Weirdest Underwear Headlines:

Wait, wait, wait… They asked him? Once an underwear-clad man stumbles all the way into your court room and begins rambling, we’re guessing there’s no intelligent reasoning to be had, there…

#9 in the Weirdest Underwear Headlines:

It’s likely this was just some candid shot by a disgruntled (aren’t they all?) terrorist friend of his, but isn’t it much more fun imagining Saddam Hussein taking mirror pictures of himself for a sexy new profile pic? Answer: Yes.

#8 in the Weirdest Underwear Headlines:

Wait a minute; so, are people peeing their pants on purpose now?

#7 in the Weirdest Underwear Headlines:

“Shall I compare thine skivvies to the Andrew Christian Vivid Fuse brief? For thy choice in fabric is far less sexy and colorful!”

#6 in the Weirdest Underwear Headlines:

He can fly faster than the speed of light, leap over buildings in a single bound and has super-cool heat and x-ray vision, and you’re more concerned that he won’t have the same underwear? Yeah… it hurt our feelings, too…

#5 in the Weirdest Underwear Headlines:

“When there’s nothing left to burn, you have to set yourself on fire.” Apparently, no one ever explained metaphors to this guy.

#4 in the Weirdest Underwear Headlines:

Some ghosts kill, some turn people mentally insane, but stealing underwear… that’s just a new low. Don’t mess around with us, you callous Iowan spirits!!

#3 in the Weirdest Underwear Headlines:

Who is this thong-wearing scooter man? Why is riding a scooter? Shouldn’t there be some kind of protective gear going on? Does he really deserve saluting? These are questions that need to be answered…

#2 in the Weirdest Underwear Headlines:

Yup… Apparently they found drugs as well… *snicker snicker sneer sneer*

And finally… #1 in the Weirdest Underwear Headlines:

There are simply no words… Kittens in a freezer are one thing, but dirtying your underwear with illegal substances, that’s just immoral.

Make sure to check back next month for more of our weirdest underwear headlines!

Headline Credit: Gizmodo, The Daily Cardinal, New York Magazine, io9, Cambrian News, Deadspin, The Daily Echo, Naples News, The Guardian, Temple Terrace Patch

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